Saturday, May 16, 2009

Lunacy

I miss the writing I used to do on this blog. The transfer to the new one is just not the same. I wonder what it is.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

New Blog is UP!

I have my new blog up- email me at jenlaurita@gmail.com if you didn't already get an email with the new address. Mike, I couldn't get in touch with you. Anyone else, see ya over there soon!
I'll be vomiting and wonderful there.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

best. tshirt. ever.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

The end of this blog

I've decided I'm am not going to write this blog anymore. I am definitely going to continue to blog, just not here. If you would like to still follow me, post here (we can work out contact infor) and I will let you know where/when the new blog will pop up.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Dear 2008

Dear 2008,
It is with a mix of emotions that I say good bye to you. Without doubt you have been the hardest of all my years. You taught me a lot, you took from me a lot, and you are leaving me a far better person than you found me.
In your beginning, I started with promises. I have always enjoyed making promises to the New Year and 2009 will be no exception. I enjoyed keeping all but one of those promises to you, the exception being that I never did get to do a split. A silly ambition, I know, but one I wanted nonetheless.
I did keep my promises to you though, 2008. I promised to do a lot of nice things for people, and I feel I did that. Unfortunately, I did some really hurtful things to some people too, and it has helped me learn some extraordinarily powerful lessons. It helped me learn that for all the promises I made and kept, I didn't make the kind that are the most important- I didn't make any promise to be mindful. In the beginning, I had not developed a deep sense of mindfulness of others. My promises were all self-serving for the most part- ride a lot of miles, get published, lose weight. I didn't think of a deeper spiritual place, I wasn't selfless.
In your year, my 33rd, I grew more than I have ever grown before. I sat in front of a doctor and I heard the word cancer. It's pretty much the only word I heard that day, every other utterance is a blur. And I cried. I cried deep, choking, tears for literally months on end. Sometimes I cried for entire days. I don't mean that in a poetic way either. I cried for the hurt I caused, I cried for the friends I lost, I cried for myself and my body, I cried for my son, for my mother on her knees before me telling me she wished she could take my cancer. But I also cried for joy. I cried for the love that was given to me by so many people who knew I was hurting. I cried out of a grateful heart to the doctors and nurses and healers who comforted me and showered me with kindness. I cried when I heard the word benign. I'm crying now.
I am deeply grateful for all the lessons you gave me. You taught me that I possess strength deeper than I ever imagined, and more importantly how to farm that strength- how to plant seeds of goodness that grow into positivity. You gave me my religion this year which helps me everyday to understand the world and to be present.
As I reflect back on this year, I see major trials. Not even major, they were gargantuan. WERE. They're not anymore. And so into 2009 I carry a sense of peacefulness and happiness knowing that it's going to be a good year. It can't not be, I won't allow it.
I am looking forward to 2009. I am hoping that it will be filled with health for myself and my loved ones. I am hoping it will be filled with healing- healing of hearts, healing of friendships with people I still deeply miss, and many many miles of safe and fun bike riding.

Thank you 2008. Now go away.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Worst Resume Ever

Once, a long time ago, I was a recruiter for AT&T. I would spend my days searching resumes, receiving resumes, interviewing, and memorizing Harry Newton's Telecom Dictionary which though it sounds terribly dull (ok it is) the author has a great sense of humor and infuses much of it into his dictionary with arbitrary cultural references and amusing anecdotes.
One day, I came across the single worst resume I had ever seen. I've removed the personal information and copied the body here.

Read it thoroughly, it's worth it- my favorite part being, "Taugted children basic skills in reading , writing". Then let's see how many errors you can find. For what it's worth, I contacted the person, offered to edit their resume and send it back to them, which I did. Months later I found the identical resume still on Monster. sigh.
My problem isn't that some people can't write well, or spell. It's that someone didn't take any care to have this looked over for even the smallest of errors. OR that a professional recruiter redid the resume for them to use instead, but they chose to stick with this one. Oh well.

All typos are original.

To obtain an award winning career so that I can use my skills to the best of my ability.


EXPERIENCE: 12/2004 - 7/2006 DR.Bunn's office Melrose Park, IL

Industry: Healthcare Services
Front office receptionis
Answering telephones , sceduling appointment Billing insurance companys and resolving billing issues.

11/2005 - 3/2006 kiddie kandidis Lombard, IL

Industry: Retail

SAles associate
I had to put the finishing touches on the pitchers the photographer has taken of the children and thie family so that they can purchase.

4/2000 - 10/2002 United chamber Downers Grove, IL

Industry: Healthcare Services

Customer service representative

Answering incominig calls from policy holders ,providers ,agents and master marketing representative and advising them on claims status.Resolve billing issues, provide policy administative asistanton claim analys and communicate with all otherdepartment on behalf of the policy holder, providers and agentmastering representative.

11/1997 - 5/2001 Broadview Park Dist Broadview, IL

Industry: Education

Child care coordinator

Supervised small children ages 3-5 Taugted children basic skills in reading , writing and drawing. Maintained a safe playing enviroment for the children.


EDUCATION: 12/2005 OLympia College US-IL-Burr Ridge

Some College Coursework Completed
I graduated from olympia college with a 3.5GPA in the medical administrative Diplomia program.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Starting the new year off right


Alright so I started the year off well by riding this morning. I spent the majority of my day cleaning the kitchen and prepping foods so I can be back on my healthy eating plan. It was a great (and generous) indulgence to allow myself to eat pretty much whatever I wanted, though I was still reserved about a lot of things, I still refused to add sugar to anything, but I ate nut balls covered in powdered sugar (for breakfast of course). Don't try to understand my logic, it's very complicated- unless you're a woman reading this and then you understand.
So, back to the no flour, no sugar, no meat, no dairy, no dried fruit, no soy. Sounds restrictive but it's a very great way to eat when you get the hang of it- and no food ups and downs. I have no cravings, though I do feel I need to eat several small meals a day.
Anyway, my dessert right now is cantoloupe with fresh lime juice squeezed over it. If you've never tried this, you definitely need to. The lime is just the most pleasant brief sour taste before the sweetness of the cantaloupe.

As an aside, I would again like to thank my mother for the whooppee cushion she got Gray. Boy that is the gift that keeps on giving. I especially loved it when I was trying to take a nap today and Gray snuck into the room and assploded, scaring the whooppee out of me.